Man Uses Dating Site to Rape Six Women, Says He Was Expecting Arrest

Terry L. Smith Jr. of Columbus, Ohio has confessed to raping more than six women after one of his victims came forward last week. Smith met the women online and expected them not to go to the police, knowing that the shame that they felt would prevent them from taking action against him. » 8/21/14 9:30pm Yesterday 9:30pm

Here's a Tumblr of Food So Fancy, It Looks Like Iggy Azalea

There are two ways you can tell that you've really hit the big time. First, a google search for your name should autocomplete to [your name]+[plus feet]. Second, you should have a single-serving blog poking gentle fun at you blow up and then disappear in a blaze of glory. Of the two, the feet thing's more… » 8/21/14 8:30pm Yesterday 8:30pm

Here's the Strangest Piece of Exercise Equipment You've Ever Seen

Forget the Shake Weight, forget Sauna Suits and forget Tony Little's Gazelle, because there's a new piece of fitness equipment on the scene that's so ridiculous that just by looking at it you will descend into a shame spiral that will rival anything you've ever felt in tenth grade. Allow me to present the glory that… » 8/21/14 7:15pm Yesterday 7:15pm

Conservative Congress Candidate Poses With Wholesome Horse Erection

You may not yet be familiar with congressional candidate Gary Kiehne, a hell of a guy who's all about family values, fighting abortion and making up statistics about who's responsible for mass shootings (democrats), but you're about to be. Because the guy's got a giant horse dong in his campaign ad. Won't somebody » 8/21/14 6:40pm Yesterday 6:40pm

Same-Sex Marriages Have Been Blocked in Virginia

All same-sex marriages have been stopped in Virginia as of today. The supreme court is now deciding whether to hear the state's appeal against same-sex marriage and is also considering the question of whether same-sex marriage should be legalized nationwide. CONFIDENTIAL TO SUPREME COURT: HELL YES, IT SHOULD BE. » 8/20/14 8:30pm Wednesday 8:30pm

Adorable Four-Year-Old Food Reviewer Not Into All That Fancy Shit

Lyla Hogan was recently the youngest person to ever try the tasting Menu at The French Laundry, an eatery which known blowhard Anthony Bourdain has called "the best restaurant in the world, period." What did Lyla think of the 5 hour-plus food experience? Well, she liked the ginger ale and the bathroom! » 8/20/14 5:20pm Wednesday 5:20pm

Youngest Human Barbie is 16, Has Good Genes and 'Big Breasts'


The newest human barbie to emerge from the internet's shiny pink box is 16-year-old Lolita Richi (real name? no), a Ukranian teenager who says she's never had surgery and doesn't use photoshop. Oh, and she's never even heard of Valeria Lukyanova. Shots fired. (Also, she really does look like Barbie!) » 8/19/14 7:45pm Tuesday 7:45pm

Florida Man Picks Fight With Fire Hydrant When Asked About Prowling

A very reasonable man in St. Petersburg, Florida took a novel approach to being questioned by police about peeking into windows last week. He told the officers he was looking for "Tony" (aren't we all?) and then proceeded to try and beat the shit out of a fire hydrant. Because fuck fire hydrants for being dirty… » 8/19/14 5:45pm Tuesday 5:45pm

No, Gastric Bypass Hypnosis Won't Make You Lose All That Weight

Real talk: Hypnotherapy is awesome, but it will never take the place of weight-loss surgery. Why? Because one is a medical procedure that transforms your stomach and hormones forever, and the other is a motivational tool that works only if you really want it to. Save your money! Buy a guided CD instead. » 8/19/14 4:45pm Tuesday 4:45pm

Man Fakes Death in Worst Possible Way to Get Out Of Getting Married

If you're going to fake your own death to get out of marrying someone, here's what you should do instead: Tell them you don't want to get married. It's going to be less work and less heartbreak than calling up your no longer loved one, pretending to be your father and telling her that you committed suicide. Trust me.… » 8/18/14 11:30pm Monday 11:30pm

Man Gets Dick Chopped Off, Still Has More Sex Than Any Of Us

What's better than a guy with two dicks answering all the questions you might have about his endowment? Not much, but a contender has appeared. Meet Penisindoor, a man who is dickless due to a bloody accident and who's currently awaiting an experimental penile transplant. Close your eyes if you're squeamish. » 8/18/14 8:20pm Monday 8:20pm

Lonely Hipster Uses Robot to Seduce Women on OKCupid

It's a tale as old as time: Boy signs up for OkCupid. Boy decides that girls are just there to find someone not to be lonely with. Boy gets disillusioned. Boy messes with girls on a dating website as a poignant project showing off the deep loneliness inherent to online dating. Boy creates Tumblr. Everyone thinks it is… » 8/14/14 6:30pm 8/14/14 6:30pm

Iranian President Posts Revolutionary Photo Of Fields Medal Winner

» 8/14/14 3:50pm 8/14/14 3:50pm

Adult Film Stars Rally to Help Christy Mack Pay Her Medical Expenses

Yesterday, we reported that Dog the Bounty Hunter had joined the fray to find War Machine, the man who beat and sexually assaulted his former girlfriend, adult film star Christy Mack. Since then, Dog has done nothing but retweet (which is v. important), while Mack's fellow adult film performers have gotten together… » 8/14/14 3:10pm 8/14/14 3:10pm