Tyson Beckford's Naked Torso Beckons You To Enter Chocolate City

Move over Magic Mike XXL! There's a new stripper movie in town and it's got Tyson Beckford flexing everything that God gave him. 13-year-old closeted me is very excited. So is 30-year-old out me. Everything about this movie, aside from its awful title, seems excellent and it hasn't even been finished yet. » 10/30/14 5:15pm Thursday 5:15pm

4-Year-Old Reviews Fancy Restaurant Adults Would Kill to Get Into

Have you ever seen anything more hilarious than a tiny child who is not old enough to appreciate fine dining be subjected to the classiest food and service available? I haven't, but that's because I don't get out a lot. And because there is nothing funnier than a four-year-old who can't read a menu. Well, maybe a… » 10/30/14 3:15pm Thursday 3:15pm

Grave Robber Digs Up Dozens of Dead Girls, Turns Bodies Into Dolls

Just in case you were having a pleasant day and needed to be reminded that basically everything in the world is terrible and that life is a meaningless void from which none of us are able to truly escape, here's a story about a man who dug up dead girls, turned them into dolls and stuck music boxes into their ribcages. » 10/30/14 1:10pm Thursday 1:10pm

The Best Questions and Answers From Amy Poehler's Delightful AMAA

If you have two ears, a heart and a penchant for smart, funny women who kick ass, take names and mix a whole lot of metaphors, you've probably already heard that Amy Poehler did a Reddit AMAA (YOLO, but with limits, you know?) and rocked that town like she was the 1989 earthquake. (I can say that because I lived… » 10/30/14 11:10am Thursday 11:10am

Man's Girlfriend Can't Stop Quoting Memes Even During Sex and Funerals

There's nothing better after a long day of blogging (or whatever you do for a living) than a nice jaunt off to r/adviceanimals or a quick spin around the most viral photos on imgur for some of the best memes around*, but imagine if your partner wouldn't stop speaking like doge. Ever. Here's one man's nightmare. » 10/29/14 11:30pm Wednesday 11:30pm

The Haunted Vagina Is the Scariest Book of The Halloween Season

Let this be a warning: What you're about to read is more frightening than any malevolent spirit you may meet on Halloween night. Ghosts and vampires may be slightly scary, but there is nothing more terrifying than a vagina full of dead people. Yes, friends it's a veritable cervix full of corpses in here. (No, really.… » 10/29/14 10:00pm Wednesday 10:00pm

Mama June's Dated Sex Offenders Before, Sugar Bear Doesn't Want Custody

With all the shocking news that's come out about Mama June lately, it's kind of hard to be surprised by the latest nugget of information that's found itself out of the bleak and awful mess that is Mama June getting back together with her daughter's molester, but here it is anyway: This isn't June's first time at the… » 10/29/14 8:30pm Wednesday 8:30pm